>coupon not valid with any other offer.

>Me: “I have a tummyache”.
Carrie: “Have a bagel.”
Me: “A bagel for a tummyache, huh?”
Carrie: “Yup”.
Me: So the next time Aidan has a tummyache, I should tell him to …”
Carrie: “Have a bagel.”
Me: “Ah.”

Me: “Are you crying?”
Carrie: “Yes.”

Me: “Ew!”
Carrie: “Wanna see it?
Melissa: “Wow…”
Me: “Want some lemon juice for that?”
Melissa: “Folder files kill.”
Me: “are you gonna die?”
Carrie: “yes.”
Melissa: “We do have an orthopedic surgeon here today…”

Me: “Was that a cough?”
Shannon: “Yes.”
Me: “That was weak. Ya need some phlegm in there.”
Shannon: “I can’t do that.”
Me: (demonstrating)…”c’mon, it’s easy…”
Shannon: “Dude…hold on!” (hock-a-loogie noise)…”ew…”

Random voice from the IT office: “I’m oscillating…”

Me: “Badger, Pi, or Llama?”
Carrie: “Badger.”
Me: “You always pick badger…”
Carrie: “Okay, Llama.”

Connie(via fax): “Well, nuts! I’m dead in the water on that one!”

Carrie: “If Connie calls, tell her I’ll be right back…”
Me: “Connie can’t call…she’s dead in the water…”

Me: “Those are very turquoise pants…”
Carrie: “They’re my toothpaste pants…”
Melissa: “Like Aqua Fresh?”
Me: “What color socks?”
Carrie: “Purple…purple monkey socks.”
Me: “lemmee guess…they were the ones in the top of the drawer…”
Carrie: No, I was actually trying to find normal socks today.”
Me: “So that’s as normal as they get, huh?”
Carrie: “For today.”

Connie: “Can I talk to Carrie?”
Me: “Sure!”
Connie: “Who is this?”
Me: “Jennifer.”
Connie: “Oh, Jennifer! Hellooo! I thought Carrie was extension 200…”
Me: “Nope, she’s 201. Want me to transfer you?”
Connie: “Yea, please!”
Hit transfer, 201, transfer, Carries phone rings…
Carrie: “Did you transfer her?”
Me: “Yes, your phone rang, didn’t it?”
Carrie “Yes, but she wasn’t there…”
Me: “Crap. I lost Connie. Poor Connie…well, she knows your extension now.”
Carrie: “So she’s gone?”
Me: (looking at the blinking red light on the phone console…) “No! Wait! There she is! She’s blinking!! I’ve found Connie!”
Carrie & Me: “Yaaaaaaay!!!!”
Connie: “???”

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