Damn it all I can’t sleep. Again. Trying to withstand the urge to down my usual tylenol PM/Benadryl cocktail. Not exactly a good habit to have. There are several constructive things I could be doing in my newfound time, but I don’t trust myself to do them with any sense of efficiency nor accuracy. Maybe I should have a beer. Got 4 bottles of Fat Tire in there. Hmm. Definitely worth thinking about. Though drinking beer, by yourself, at 1:30 in the morning, is rather pathetic. I feel I should shy away from the pathetic.

Voulez-voulez-vous pathetic.

I should spend my time searching for every question I’ve had in my lifetime. Or at lest every question I can come up with in the next 15 minutes.

1. Why do dogs walk in circles before laying down?
2. Why are toilet handles on the left side?
3. Why is the letter “E” on the top of the eye chart?
4. Why are racquetballs blue?
5. Where do all my missing socks go?
6. Why do all dentists’ offices smell the same?
7. Why does my greyhound like to eat dog shit?
8. Why do women get engagement rings? And why do THEY get to pick them out? Kinda takes the romance out of it if you ask me.

But, there are some things I can say definitively (in my opinion) are for certain:

You can NOT (Legally) earn $50,000 a month while working from home.
Happiness is not found in a box from Tiffany’s
popsicles are quite possibly the perfect food.
Monty Python and the Holy Grail is the best movie ever in the whole wide world.
aunt Flo sucks ass.
Almost anything can be eaten with chopsticks.
You can never have too many books.
(Except when you move; when you’re moving, books can be a royal pain in the ass)
And last but not least, I believe I am finally getting sleepy. Think I’ll crawl into bed, read a little bit more of The Lost World that I’ve resurrected from the downstairs closet, and see if that won’t knock me on my ass. Sitting at the computer sure ain’t gonna do it. I’m gonna go crawl in with my hubby and my puppies.

Voulez-voulez-vous puppies.