I don’t really come from outer space.

I have successfully become one of those smart-phone junkies that I once mocked and somewhat despised.

I can’t help it…it’s so beautiful!

I, shamefully, was indeed chatting on my phone on my walk to work. I check my Facebook status updates…watch YouTube videos…I even took it with me to the bathroom once. I’m not sure what the long-term effects of this will be; it may lead to a complete and total removal from all non-digital human interaction. I’ll be like Barkley in that one episode of Star Trek TNG where he integrated himself into the computer’s mainframe and seized control of the Enterprise. I suspect I’ll be controlling the Earth’s satellites soon.

Doppler hates the new gadget. I’m playing Word Mole instead of playing with him. I expect him to try and devour it at some point. He’s neither patient nor subtle..

The honeymoon period will soon wear off…at least I’m hoping. That’s if it doesn’t shoot a coaxial cable out of it’s bowels and into my brain and use my body as an instrument of evil. I just had a flash of South Park where Cartman’s body was overtaken by his Trapper Keeper and he morphed into a giant, all-consuming mound of lumpy flesh which slouched about devouring anything in his path. Bad pie…bad pie…

I’ve been annoying all of my friends I’m sure…I think I’ve been excessively texting in my desire to play with my new toy. “Hey, my shoes are muddy!”, “I have an inflatable rubber cowboy…”. “What’s your favorite non-dairy product?”.

I’m awaiting restraining orders.

I’m surprised I’m not writing this from the damn thing. Though I must confess the typing isn’t as efficient and I feel like I have sausage fingers. Typos are abundant.

Gotta run…I just got an alert on my phone.

Voulez-voulez-vous TechnoJunkie

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